Bubble Boys, Ball Drops & Every Meme From Sedgefield

Good morning. This is your Happy Valley Golf Team newsletter. Let’s get it!

Here’s what we’ve got for you today:

• Wyndham or bust: Top-70 playoff line has dudes sweatier than Greensboro in August—see who needs a miracle and who just needs a clean scorecard.

• Commander-in-Cheat cameo: Fresh Turnberry footage, renewed foot-wedge memes, internet court in session.

• Augusta whitewater? Leaked video turns Amen Corner into a rafting ad—Twitter loses it.

P.S: If you want to read any previous editions of the newsletter you can on our website and if you were forwarded this email you can subscribe here.

Unsolicited Golf Tips

Watch: The LAST Putting Lesson You Will Ever Need - 3 Simple Tips

Golf Trivia

Wyndham Championship: Golf’s Version of Musical Chairs—And the DJ’s about to kill the music

Final stop of the regular season, folks. When the horn sounds Sunday evening, only the top 70 in FedExCup points punch a ticket to next week’s FedEx St. Jude Championship—everyone else is speed-dialing their real-estate agent for an early offseason tee sheet. In other words, Sedgefield just became the bouncer between $20 million playoff purses and your couch.

Sedgefield Country Club itself is no softy: 7,127 yards, par 70, Donald Ross humps and crowned Champion-Bermuda greens that repel timid wedges faster than your buddies reject a 3-footer given in stroke play. It’s precision over pop, begging for laser irons, nervy lag putts, and the occasional meltdown we’ll GIF forever.

Bubble Boys & Other Storylines 🔥

• The Knife-Edge 70 Line: Matti Schmid is the Bubble Boy, five points clear of Nicolai Højgaard. Keith Mitchell, Chris Kirk, and Gary Woodland all need PGA-Tour-Live-Producer math to survive—think solo 58th or better, depending on who else stumbles.

• Rickie vs. Max, Good Vibes vs. Mission Impossible: Fowler (65th) just needs a weekend stroll; Homa (103rd) basically needs a win, a blood moon, and maybe Oprah’s blessing.

• Spieth Spiral Watch: Three-year winless drought, and he’s sitting mid-pack at No. 48. The model people have him around 30-1, but they also thought “Cats” would be a hit film.

• Fitz-Factor: Matt Fitzpatrick arrives as the shortest number on the board at 20-1, fresh off four straight top-20s and looking to vault deeper into that playoff money trough.

Bet-Slip Buffet (Whose Names We’ll Scribble on the Mortgage Check)

Quick-Fire Course Intel

Front nine = sweet-tea handshake. Back nine = tax audit. Nos. 13 and 17 have Rossian run-offs that’ll make wedges weep, while the uphill finisher on 18 has torpedoed more playoff dreams than a Sunday shank at Q-School. Historically, −18ish gets you the Sam Snead Cup—as long as Greensboro’s humidity doesn’t melt your SuperStroke grip first.

Parting Shot

Think of Wyndham as the frantic airport-chase scene of the PGA-Tour rom-com: one guy grabs the last postseason ticket, someone else ugly-cries at baggage claim. Play the Ross specialists, fade the spray-and-pray crowd, and hope your +3000 ticket survives the turbulence. Hydrate accordingly—both your bankroll and your liver will be sweating by Sunday.

News You Need to Know

Commander-in-Cheat, Reloaded - A fresh clip from Trump Turnberry shows a staffer “accidentally” plopping a ball onto the fairway just as No. 45 strolls up, sparking yet another Twitter storm about presidential foot-wedges and earned him a same-day revival of the Commander-in-Cheat hashtag. The internet jury? Guilty, with memes.

Private-Equity Putter Panic - Niche-to-notorious L.A.B. Golf just sold a majority stake to L Catterton for a rumored $200 million, and Reddit’s gear-heads are split between “cash-out, king” and “RIP innovation.” Founder Bill Presse goes from trailer shop to luxury-backed boardroom while putter prices look primed for a moon-shot.

Happy Gilmore 2 Nukes Netflix Records - Adam Sandler’s sequel tee’d off July 25 and hammered 46.7 million views in three days, the biggest U.S. opening weekend in Netflix history. Cameos from Travis Kelce and Bad Bunny didn’t hurt, and the original Happy Gilmore even rode the wave back into the Top 10. It’s all in the hips…and the algorithm.

Amen Corner Becomes Whitewater Park - Newly leaked video shows floodwaters ripping through Augusta National’s iconic 11-13 stretch, turning Rae’s Creek into a Class IV rapid. The clip went viral when viewers spotted construction gear bobbing downstream; club insiders say damage is “mostly cosmetic,” but golf Twitter lost its collective visor anyway.

Incognito Club-Fitting Chaos - PGA Tour grinder Zac Blair strolled into Golf Galaxy undercover, got treated like a 15-handicap, and the whole stealth fitting blew up on TikTok. Sales staff never clocked the tour card until Blair’s TrackMan numbers started flirting with 180 mph ball speed—cue 2 million LOLs and instant free advertising for both Blair and the big-box store.

Thanks for reading!

Enjoy the rest of your week,

Cody.